The Spring of Rain

I’m sure most folks follow the weather to some extent, even if it’s as minimal as noticing if it’s raining or cold or hot or whatever while walking to their car or looking out a window. Here in Kansas we have a saying “If you don’t like the weather, wait ten minutes, it’ll change” and typically that is what seems to happen. Except this Spring Kansas has decided to make up for whatever drought-like conditions we have had over the last 10-20 years and go ahead and get us all the water we need for the next several years. The only problem with that is that most folks have not adjusted their homesteads to handle that much water all at once, including your humble Mad Farmer.

Several years ago when I first heard about Permaculture I started reading everything I could find and started listening to podcasts, watching YouTube videos and reading blogs. There are some truly great resources available now, Scott Mann’s Permaculture Podcast, Diego Footer’s Permaculture Voices, Paul “The Duke of Permaculture” Wheaton at Permies.com, Jack Spirko at The Survival Podcast, Rob & Michelle Avis of Verge Permaculture and of course, Geoff Lawton, the appointed heir of Father of Permaculture, Bill Mollison, as well as many, many more. Once you get into the actual design stage of Permaculture my biggest take away is storing and using energy – more specifically water.

Successful Permaculture design, and for that matter, any site design needs to account for water: how much, where it comes from, what you will do with it, how it can be stored and ultimately, directed back into your site or off site in the best way possible. We’ve been at the current homestead for just over five years. When you make changes slowly over time it’s difficult to see what has changed. We have been taking pictures along the way and it’s startling what the property looked like five years ago and how much we have actually accomplished in that time. Some of the changes have been a deliberate attempt to shape our landscape, some of the changes have been made for convenience and lifestyle and some have been just flat out experimental “Hey, let’s see what happens if we do this”.

The farther I move along the Permaculture path and work on deliberate design the more I understand there is always more to refine and tweak and re-design. It turns out that because life is an ever-changing system there are always variables you can only attempt to plan for. Maybe it’s 10 inches of rain in two or three days, maybe it’s a scorching hot summer or a bitter cold winter. Plan resilience into your systems, remember that “One is None, Two is One and Three is Better” when working on your designs and systems and remember that almost everything has multiple uses and inputs and outputs, almost nothing in nature is a single straight line. Observe, research and plan and good luck with your variables.

TSL Homestead and Air Conditioning

So here in Kansas the seasons can turn pretty rapidly. Last year we went from freezing cold straight into 90 plus degree days (we’re still Fahrenheit here in the U.S. in case you are keeping track) and it was a very strange gardening year. Really didn’t have much of a Spring at all and it showed. Tomatoes struggled, they are the Divas of the garden anyway, and everything else needed regular watering or it scorched. The Cucumber beetles and Squash Vine Borers ate everything else that wasn’t protected. Overall, not a year you look back fondly on if you’re a Mad Farmer.

This year it was cold, Winter had snow more like I remembered from my childhood, more years ago than I care to discuss, and Spring was definitely coming in like a lion. Lots and lots of storms, Tornadoes in Missouri and lots of wet and chill. For all the folks out there screaming “See!!!! Climate Stuff!!!!!” there is a scientific explanation for at least part of it. The Mad Farmer is not on the anti-climate change wagon, I’m sure that people have some impact on their environment, both good and bad. I’m also not a “climate denier” whatever that is. Climate is weather and environment – good or bad, it’s climate – I guess you can “deny” it if you want but I don’t think climate cares. Personally my feeling is, if we caused it, we can probably fix it but we better make dang sure what we are fixing or it could be worse.

Anyway, the science stuff that explains a bit of it is that according to what I’ve read* there is El Nino and La Nina, basically wind systems that pass over the Pacific Ocean. Depending on which way they go they have a different effect on climate. Every few years they switch as Primary and Secondary systems and whichever is the Primary system impacts where tornadoes and storms appear. When La Nina is strongest Tornado alley shifts South and East, causing more storms and tornadoes in places like Missouri and Louisiana, where there typically aren’t as many and reducing those types of events in the Northern parts of the U.S. where they tend to be more usual.

Anyway, this post is not a climate change discussion but the weather does have an impact here in Kansas. It had been cold and wet for most of late Winter and early Spring and there was very short period, maybe three days, where the temperatures got up into the 80’s. Your humble Mad Farmer really doesn’t mind those kind of temps for the most part, he was born on the first day of Summer, but Miss Mercy is a different story. The Mad Farmer is cold when the temperature is below 80 degrees Fahrenheit and Miss Mercy is hot when it’s over 80 degrees. We’ve had many a discussion about where we might be comfortable together but all we’ve determined so far is it probably won’t be California – all other options are still in negotiation, including Kansas.

So, to make a long story longer, which is the Farmer way, the furnace filter was changed and we tried to start the Air Conditioning to prevent the upstairs bedroom from being overly warm. We got a limited amount of cold air coming out of the registers, not enough to effectively cool anything. At this point I’m really wishing we lived in a WOFATI (check it out here https://permies.com/t/wofati ), but we don’t so I contacted my brother, Jack of All Trades, and asked him for the number of the HVAC Wizard. We had the HVAC Wizard repair the furnace at our previous homestead and, like all wizards, he is mysterious and his ways are not the ways of mortals but he is effective and reasonable is his pursuit of coin.

The Mad Farmer was hoping that the HVAC Wizard would be able to perform his magic before the Summer heat of Kansas began in earnest. Sadly, it was not to be. The HVAC Wizard was plying his trade magicking the Heating systems that are the “HV” portion of his trade. Eventually, after several weeks of chill temperatures and lots of rain, the weather in Kansas finally decided to give Spring a miss and go straight on into Summer. At that point it became more urgent to contact the HVAC Wizard so through the magic of “texting” the Mad Farmer was able to gain an audience with the Wizard. The Wizard was able to fit a visit to the Farmer homestead into his busy schedule and just like that, he appeared.

Just like Merlin, the HVAC Wizards coming and goings are mysterious. He reminds this farmer of the long ago Shaolin Monk, Kane, wandering the earth and fixing HVAC problems instead of fixing the problems of individual villagers. However, I digress. The Wizard appeared and within moments had diagnosed the issue, acquired replacement items from his traveling warehouse (sometimes referred to as “a truck”) and repaired the Air Conditioning system, accepted a reasonable amount of coin in exchange for his labors and was on his was his way.

The Mad Farmer learned three important lessons from this experience. First, there is a component on the homestead unit called the starter kit. This is an important component that allows your Air Conditioner to actually start, it is a good thing when this works correctly. The second thing learned is that you should always hose off the exterior AC unit to prevent build up of dirt and anything that might impede air flow. The more air that can get past the cooling “fins” on the unit to the interior cooling core the more efficient your unit will operate. The third thing I learned is that buying inexpensive filters and changing them more often will save more coin than buying more expensive filters and changing them less often.

The ultimate take away is that if you don’t have the skills to resolve an issue yourself, it’s good to know who to contact to and that you trust that person. The homestead could have contacted a more commercial wizard and probably had a fine resolution, but it is satisfying to do business with local contractors that you have built a relationship with over time. The other take away is that when Miss Mercy can sleep easily at night, the Homestead runs more smoothly. A Happy Spouse makes a Happy House.

*Disclaimer: The Mad Farmer is not a weather expert and does not play one on the interwebs.

Squirrel Warfare

So because Miss Mercy loves the Mad Farmer (I have it on good authority this is true) and because she has access to the local Master Gardener library she came home today with a present for me – she checked out a book called “Outwitting Squirrels” for me.

The full title is “Outwitting Squirrels: 101 Cunning Stratagems to Reduce Dramatically the Egregious Misappropriation of Seed from Your Bird-feeder by Squirrels” by Bill Adler, Jr. The cover blurb reads as follows:

“Birdloving Americans face a common enemy: the squirrel. This fast, crafty, incredibly greedy creature casts our pleasures to the wind, brings his buddies to lunch, and pillages our birdfeeders before our very eyes.

Here, at last, is the answer. OUTWITTING SQUIRRELS is a defense manual for besieged feeders of birds. Spooker poles, Perrier bottles, baffled fishing line, Vaseline, water bombs, cayenne pepper, and Nixalite – author Bill Adler, Jr. has tried them all (well, nearly all). In addition he rates popular birdfeeders, discusses specialty seed, profiles the enemy, and regales the reader with squirrel adventures and mis-adventures, many of them his own”.

So from this we learn two things: One, Bill Adler, Jr. appears to be a man after my own heart, tilting at the squirrel windmill – hopefully with some success. Second, this book is about keeping squirrels away from your birdfeeders. I am hopeful that some of the techniques will be useful in keeping the little buggers away from my vegetables, but time will tell. I am sure that if you have the slightest interest in the subject at all that the ongoing fight between MadFarmer and cunning rodent will continue and at the very least provide some slight amusement dear reader.

Here is to hoping all your squirrel battles are resolved in your favor…

Squirrels

The Mad Farmer lives in the Midwest, Kansas specifically, and the current bane of my existence are the squirrels in our yard. Where we live we have red squirrels. Slightly Northeast of us there are grey squirrels, maybe they are nicer, I hope so. Sadly the red squirrels are not nice.

Last year we had even more squirrels in the yard but last fall we were able to remove a couple of nuisance trees from our front yard, a sweet gum and a pin oak. Sweet gum trees are are fast growing and horrible tree. The female trees shed seeds in the form of spiky balls of death that you don’t want to step on, are good for nothing I’m aware of and come out from underneath the mower at a high rate of speed and careen into innocent bystanders shins. Literally a tree no one misses. The pin oak had been struggling with some disease and had been sickly the entire time we have lived here. With those trees removed it really opened up the yard and allows a lot more light into the garden.

Why is the Mad Farmer droning on about trees? Who cares? What does this have to do with squirrels? Well, we had a lot more squirrels last year when we still had those trees and for the most part they left my garden alone. The occasional squirrel would dig up an area of the garden and bury a nut or seed but for the most part we lived in harmony. They would sit on the fence and tease my dog. My dog would pathetically attempt to chase them and fail miserably. For the most part it was live, and let live. But after the tree removal incident of 2018 the squirrels were angry. They appear to have resented the loss of habitat, or an escape route or whatever their reasons, they seem to be unhappy.

This year, they are really teasing the dog. They chatter at all hours. They chew limbs off our silver maple and attempt to drop them on my head. And they eat my vegetables! The last part is the really irritating part. I might be Mad but I’m not crazy and this year I started my tomato plants and cabbage and other plants early, under grow lights in our basement. Like you should if you want to start picking tomatoes in June in Kansas. Didn’t start them as early as I should have but did start them in March and had a reasonable crop of young plants ready for transplant after the frost danger had passed. We’ve had very wet and cold spring this year so it took a while before I was able to plant those starts.

Over the last two weeks we’ve had six inches of rain in five days. We’ve had a little bit of intermittent sun. Those plants were digging life. They were growing well. They were putting on height. Then the squirrels started eating everything. Last year, I had issues, squash bugs, heat stroke, sudden storms that flattened crops – lots of problems, but all natural. I hear what you’re saying “Squirrels are natural” – so is arsenic and the plague. But this year the squirrels are eating every single top off my new tomato plants. Eating the pepper plants I bought at the Master Gardener fundraising plant sale. Digging up and chewing my baby cabbage plants. Tearing up my garlic. At this point I am not loving squirrels.

I’m currently in negotiations with Miss Mercy about my squirrel control options. My preferred method of squirrel control she is not loving (it involves the possibility of “shooting your eye out”). I’m not a fan of chemical resolution methods. If anyone has any natural methods of repelling the small, fury, unwanted Uncles of the animal kingdom I’m open to suggestions. Looking forward to hearing options. Have a great day and may all your squirrels be someone else’s problem.

Friends

One of my oldest friends and his wife drove up from Texas to attend my daughters wedding. JB and I met in high school and have been fast friends ever since. I was best man at his wedding and he is the reason my mother to this day will not attend outdoor weddings (his was on the hottest day in May in Kansas – it might not have been a record but it certainly made an impression on my mother). He and his wife are coming up on their 36th Anniversary and are one of the strongest couples I know. They kindly made time today to drop by the Mad Farmer homestead on their way back to Texas via visiting relatives on the way.

JB and I are the kind of friends where you can start a conversation, take some time off and not see each other for a while and pick back up where we left off like no time had passed. I was startled to find out we hadn’t really talked in depth for a considerable amount of time, almost two years. In my mind it was always like we had just talked a few weeks ago. Two things came out of that realization – one, I’m blessed to have people like that in my life. People who aren’t always right in the middle of things but that you have a deep enough relationship that when important things come up, they are there for you, and you for them. The second thing that came out of that conversation was that I really need to do a better job of keeping up with people that are important to me. There are always things that get in the way, always things that distract but it is important to remember the people and relationships are important and should be nurtured.

I am very thankful for the people in my life that are truly friends. I have a lot of acquaintances but a relatively small circle of actual friends and that’s okay. Better to have one or two true friends than 100 that pay lip service to the concept but can’t be relied on. Make the most of your friendships, nurture them and be thankful for the true friends in your life

Family

Last night I was blessed to give away my eldest daughter at her wedding. I don’t mean in the sense that she was as item that I was able to take back to the return counter or a something that was won in raffle or silent auction. I mean that in a humble way I was allowed to walk my first born daughter down the aisle and shake the hand of the man she was to marry and be at peace with that.

I haven’t always made the best choices in my relationships in the past. Marrying Miss Mercy, my wife, is the best decision I ever made. Miss Mercy is my best friend every day. She supports my good choices and calls me on my poor choices. We have a great life – not always smooth, but always entertaining and every bad choice I made she tempers and improves.

The last few weeks have been a fantastic ride and a semi-validation of parenting. My daughter has made very mature decisions for her age. My daughter has a kind and caring heart. Her new husband is an excellent example of a person with a strong commitment towards public service. The semi-validation part is that my daughter is making good life choices, most awesomely in the choice of a husband. In a world where everyone seems willing to take anything and everything at face value, I am convinced that this young couple has the connection to make it through the early times and expand their love into the middle and mature years.

I am looking forward to the future because I am excited to see what comes from nurturing the past and present. In many ways this is the fruition of Permaculture,  the eventual payoff to a life time of planning and optimism. Bless their union and all of the people who read this.

A very proud Mad Farmer